her vagine was all disorganized.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Dick very happy bro
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
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