That's intense
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
