Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
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