Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
