My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize