Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Randomize
