I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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