I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
