I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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