The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
