I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
