throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
