drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
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