i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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