the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
You were trust falling into bushes
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Randomize
