another moral hangover. fuck.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
