Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Randomize
