I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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