This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
