Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
