i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
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