we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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