I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
