Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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