We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Randomize
