How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
last night I used snow as a chaser
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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