Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
