Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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