Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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