If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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