That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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