Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
