have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
