Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
