you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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