god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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