OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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