just tell him i said nine months
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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