So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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