We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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