It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
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