it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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