So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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