i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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