Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
