Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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