My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
