i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
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