We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
