a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
